more...He Leadeth Me

On his way to Siberia, new fears about food, violence as he mixes for the first time with the criminal classes:

I realized almost immediately that I was asking the questions, raising the doubts, that I had promised not to ask in abandoning my self to the will of God. And I realized, too, that it is one thing to give up such doubts and questions in a moment of grace and inspiration and spritual insight, but another thing to prevent them from arising spontaneously when the harsh and rough circumstances of a moment of daily life drives from the mind everything but the here and now....

Every day to me should be more than an obstacle to be gotten over, a span of time to be endured, a sequence of hours to be survived. For me, each day came forth from the hand of God newly created and alive with opportunities to do His will. For me each day was a series of moments and incidents to be offered back to God, to be consecrated and returned in total dedication to His will. That was what my priesthood demanded of me, as it is demanded of every Christian.