More from "He Leadeth Me":
This tendency to set acceptable conditions upon God, to seek unconsciously to make His will for us coincide with our desires, is a very human trait. And the more important the situation is, the more totally we are committed to it or the more completely our future depends on it, then the easier it becomes to blind ourselves into thinking that what we want is surely what God must also want. We can see but one solution only, and naturally we assume that God will help us reach it. ...
I had ... expected the Spirit to instruct me so that I might conquer my interrogator, my persecutor. How foolish and how selfish! It was not the Church that was on trial in Lubianka. (the Russian prison where Fr. Ciszek was confined and interrogated.) It was not the Soviet Government or the NKVD versus Walter Ciszek. God was testing me, like gold in a furnance, to see how much of self remained after all my prayers and professions of faith in His will.
Reading these lines again, (and they do lose something out of context), reminds me again and again of how guilty I am in trying to make my will His will, and how most events are about individual souls and not quite what we might think.
From Bethany, the small holding in Bethune...Oremus pro invicem!
No comments:
Post a Comment